Focus on what you can do: Love gratuitously

Focus on what you can do: Love gratuitously

heart candle
Shutterstock

Gretchen R. CroweAs I was reading Fratelli Tutti, Pope Francis’ latest encyclical regarding fraternity and social companionship prompted me to maintain an ongoing compilation of quotes that resonated with me. As expected, the more I delved into the text, the more extensive the list became.

Fratelli Tutti is an extensive letter, replete with significant concepts and ideals, and it will require years to fully understand and reflect on the pope’s views, not to mention to implement some of his more ambitious themes. However, this does not imply that the encyclical lacks smaller actions that each of us can incorporate into our everyday lives to foster greater love for one another.

My current aim is to concentrate on just one of those minor elements: the concise segment in the fourth chapter that elaborates on the concept of “a gratuitousness open to others.”

“Gratuitousness,” as defined by Pope Francis in the text, refers to “the capacity to perform certain actions solely because they are inherently good, without regard for personal benefit or reward.”

“Existence devoid of brotherly generosity,” Pope Francis states, “transforms into a type of relentless trade, wherein we perpetually evaluate what we offer and what we receive in exchange.”

The excerpt brought to mind a segment of Bishop Robert Barron’s masterpiece “Catholicism,” in which he discusses the essence of love — emphasizing that it is not merely an emotion or a sense of belonging, but actively choosing the good “of the other as other.” Anyone who is in a marriage understands just how accurate this is.

Bishop Barron states: “Frequently, we behave well or show kindness or act justly towards others with the hope that they will reciprocate by being good, kind or just in return. However, this is a form of indirect self-interest, not genuine love.”

This deceptive affection transforms into a lifestyle that focuses solely on “what can I gain” — centered on self-love rather than genuine love for another. This represents the sin of self-centeredness at its most profound, most sinister, and most unattractive essence. I discover, rather uncomfortably, that I, all too often, fit this description, occasionally without awareness and at times, with full knowledge.

The other option is love offered without conditions — the selfless love discussed by Pope Francis. This is a love that does not exchange but is instead abundant, bountiful, and without cost. This, Pope Francis points out, is the way God loves us — and, naturally, how we are meant to love each other.

“We were gifted life without charge; we earned nothing for it,” the pope states. “Therefore, each one of us has the capacity to offer without seeking anything in exchange, to extend kindness to others without requiring that they reciprocate.”

Bishop Barron states that to determine if your love is genuinely given, attempt to love your adversaries. “If I am kind to an individual who opposes me and shows no interest in reciprocating, then I can be confident that I have genuinely desired his well-being rather than my own.”

This Gospel challenge brings to mind St. Thérèse of Lisieux’s reaction to a sister in Carmel who “irritated me in everything she did.” Rather than succumbing to her “instinctive aversion,” Thérèse prayed for her sister, assisted her in every possible manner, welcomed her with a smile, and if the urge to respond harshly became too intense to resist, fled from it “like a coward from the frontline.”

In Fratelli Tutti, Pope Francis envisions a grander future for our world. While we may not be able to resolve our political structure or our economic system instantly, there are still actions we can take. We can pray for those we disagree with. We can offer a smile even when it’s challenging. We can give generously without expecting anything in return. We can share love unconditionally.

Gretchen R. Crowe is editorial director for periodicals at OSV. Follow her on Twitter @GretchenOSV.

Similar Posts